Shattered

Trying to get some closure on this weekend which was the lowpoint and very nearly the end of our time together. Initially this was a draft, but I'm not going to touch it. I don't like touching blood.

I find you
we're standing on the edge
of the end of it all,
and you're high.

Hooded, flat eyes glare out at me
Sullen words shot back in my face
as my words ricochet

You won't touch me now
If you weren't high, you'd pull me close
and we'd talk and listen and reconcile

But now I face a surly shell, pleased to be
difficult. Unfeeling.

The land mine explodes.

My throat is scratched dry, snot cakes
my face, my hair, my clothes--
the car seat I'm rocking in.

You remain high above it all, watching,
unfeeling.

I am alone until I can choke out
I need a hug

Warm arms wrap hesitantly around me
My nose bumps a shoulder

Our bodies are strangers once more.

Brimming bitter

An overwhelming sensation of bitterness crept under her eyelids, toenails, nose.

A shooter of syrupy Finlandia is hastily poured, hurled savagly from glass to back of throat, rejected, and drags up with it a bile flavoured chunk of lunch: pizza.

The quiver is plucked again; arrows shot deep into his eyes, his ears, his ass as the pounding tries to drag him down. He's up she's down, she pulls he floats.

The bottom is comforting in this non-consciousness.

Cure for darkness

When thoughts sink like stones through the marrrow,
and sunshine hides in fear under the earth,
clutch a pebble in your fist, raise it to the sky
and yell.

Hurl that pebble to a higher life, hear it click and clatter,
smack, tumbling, spinning down to a new resting place
and follow.

A Leaf Falls